Recently, I have been on a major quest to find mom friends. I have some wonderful friends in town, and I love them dearly, but they either have kids who are all grown up or they don’t plan to have any kids, and it’d be nice to connect with some women who I can talk to about baby stuff. I’ve looked for moms’ groups, but they all seem to be created for stay-at-home moms and therefore only get together during the week when I’m at work. (What’s up with that, by the way? I know it’s great for SAHMs, but us working moms want to connect with other moms, too!)
I’ve been struggling with lack-of-mom-friends induced loneliness lately, but last week I finally decided I could either sit at home and continue to cry about it, or I could be proactive and take steps to improve my situation. In a fit of desperation, I sent out a request on my neighborhood’s Facebook page to see if any of the moms in the neighborhood wanted to get together for a weekend playgroup. Then I summoned all of my will power to resist the urge to refresh the page constantly until someone responded.
Most people who know me know that I am super shy and not good at meeting new people. So it’s taking quite a lot of effort for me to set aside my insecurities, pretend I’m a lot more confident than I am, and actually reach out like this. I even consulted Twitter for the best, least-desperate-sounding wording before hitting “Post” on the Facebook page. Honestly, I was really just hoping for someone to say “Sure, let’s go to the park tomorrow!” I wasn’t looking to make a Big Thing out of it or organize anything Official.
But several people responded, and as a result, it looks like I might be in charge of organizing a neighborhood-wide playgroup that meets once a month. This is somewhat terrifying (What if nobody comes? How in the world do I organize a playgroup when I’ve never even been to a playgroup?) but also pretty exciting. One of the things that drew Tim and me to our new neighborhood was what a close-knit community it seemed to be, and I’m excited for the opportunity to actually get to know our neighbors.
(Confession: the other day I was driving home from work and saw some of our new neighbors in their driveway with a stroller. My potential-mom-friend radar went off, and as soon as I walked in the door, I told Tim we had to take advantage of the sunny weather and go for a walk right away. Secretly, I just really wanted to walk by the neighbors’ house with our stroller while they were still outside so we’d have the opportunity to introduce ourselves. My plan worked, and it turns out our neighbors are a super nice couple with a son about a year older than Alexander. Hooray for meeting the neighbors!)
Those of you who have been to playgroups…can you help a girl out? How does one organize a successful weekend playgroup? Can I just tell people to bring their children and some toys and then we let the kids play? Do I need to provide, like, refreshments or anything? Do I need to specify an age range, like babies and toddlers? Am I totally in over my head here?
Hopefully this will all work out, and Alexander and I will make some fun new friends!